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Jesy reveals why she left Little Mix


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Jesy gave her first ever interview since leaving Little Mix in December 2020.

Jesy said she felt a mix of emotions leaving the band, such as being sad but mentally she felt 'free' and that massive weight lifted off her shoulders. She said she felt an enormous amount of pressure being in a girl group.

Jesy said the hardest part about being in a girl group was constantly being compared to 3 other girls and never feeling good enough.

She said her life is A LOT more chilled now and more 'free' and less structured. Jesy also revealed Liam Payne from One Direction reached out to her after she left Little Mix.

Jesy talked about mental health and said to talk to people and be kind to yourself and surround yourself by good people.

Now I’m on my own, I can genuinely wear what I want to wear. Before, I was wearing what I thoughtI should wear, because I was too frightened to wear certain things incase I looked bigger than the others. I’d wear corsets and **** like that to make myself look the size they were. Now, I’m not looking at the screen thinking, “Oh my god, I don’t look as good as them.” I feel free.

It’s the weirdest feeling for me. I feel like I’m going to get upset. [Jesy gets tearful.] I didn’t know that I could be this happy. I thought when I was in the group that it was just normal to feel that way. And because I’d felt like that for 10 years, I just thought, "This is life." Since I’ve left, I feel free. I don’t wakeup with anxiety, thinking, "I’ve got to do a music video today, I need to starve myself." Or, "I need to go on an extreme diet so I can look like the other three." That was consuming me.

I constantly compared myself to the others. Of course, a lot of that was in my head, but a lot of it was past trauma. Even recently, I was still getting compared to them. It’s horrible when you already don’t like something about yourself to then have thousands of people point it out. Now I feel like me. When I look back [at my time] in theband, I genuinely wasn’t me. I can’t believe how miserable I was.

The last music video we did [Sweet Melody] was the breaking point. We’d been in lockdown, and [that had been] the first time I could have a break and be at home around people that I love. It was the happiest I’d ever felt, and I didn’t realise that until I went back to work. I immediately became a different person. I had anxiety. Whenever we had a music video, I put an enormous amount of pressure on myself to try and lose weight. I have a fear of looking back on the camera. If I don’t like what I see, I find it so hard to be in front of the camera and feel amazing and perform.

I’d been in lockdown, and I’d put on a bit of weight but I didn’t care.And [then] they said, "You’ve got a music video in a couple of weeks," and I just panicked. I went on this extreme diet, with bloody shakes, and tried to eat as little as possible. On the day of the Sweet Melody video I had a panic attack on set because I didn’t look how I wanted to look and I found it so hard to just be happy and enjoy myself. I looked at the other three and they were having the time of their life.

I get so jealous, because I want to feel like that and enjoy it, because music is my passion. To have this dream and not be enjoying it because of what I look like, I knew wasn’t normal. 

There’s a scene in Sweet Melody I’m not in, because that’s when I had a panic attack and broke down. I was like,"I just want to go home." I was sobbing in the dressing room. Someone really close to me said, "This has got to stop. You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You’re going to end up where you were before."

JESY: I feel like there have been a few people who don’t understand why I left Little Mix, but am now in the studio making music. A lot of people said,“I thought you came out of the band to focus on your mental health?” I never said when I put out my statement that I was coming out of the band to never be in the public eye or perform again, or do music. I said
I was coming out of the band because I genuinely couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in a girl band.

For people to think that I would just stop working completely is crazy, because[for] me, working on my mental health is going to the studio, and creating music that I love. That’s what clears my head and makes me happy. It’s good for my mental health. I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the girl group. It wasn’t that I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the spotlight. I was constantly compared to three other girls and
that mentally drove me to a really dark place, and I couldn’t put myself through that any more.

For me, that was the pinnacle point. I was like, "I need to start taking care of myself now, because this isn’t healthy." It wasn’t nice for the other three to be around someone who didn’t want to be there. So I took a break. I went through a really dark time after the music video. My mum said, "This has got to stop now. I have seen you suffer too much. This has been 10 years of your life." 

For so long, I worried about others and letting people down. The only person I should have been trying to make happy was myself, and I wasn’t doing that. I needed to do it for my mental health, because I know I would have ended up back where I was five years ago, and that’s scary.

 

Edited by Gimme More
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bionic
3 minutes ago, Gimme More said:

compared to 3 other girls and never feeling good enough.

I really feel for her and understand her decisions for leaving. This quoted bit will never change (and will probably be escalated as a solo artist). I hope she has found the peace she needs and deserves

Edited by bionic
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Gimme More

More of the interview:

Now I’m on my own, I can genuinely wear what I want to wear. Before, I was wearing what I thoughtI should wear, because I was too frightened to wear certain things incase I looked bigger than the others. I’d wear corsets and **** like that to make myself look the size they were. Now, I’m not looking at the screen thinking, “Oh my god, I don’t look as good as them.” I feel free.

It’s the weirdest feeling for me. I feel like I’m going to get upset. [Jesy gets tearful.] I didn’t know that I could be this happy. I thought when I was in the group that it was just normal to feel that way. And because I’d felt like that for 10 years, I just thought, "This is life." Since I’ve left, I feel free. I don’t wakeup with anxiety, thinking, "I’ve got to do a music video today, I need to starve myself." Or, "I need to go on an extreme diet so I can look like the other three." That was consuming me.

I constantly compared myself to the others. Of course, a lot of that was in my head, but a lot of it was past trauma. Even recently, I was still getting compared to them. It’s horrible when you already don’t like something about yourself to then have thousands of people point it out. Now I feel like me. When I look back [at my time] in theband, I genuinely wasn’t me. I can’t believe how miserable I was.

The last music video we did [Sweet Melody] was the breaking point. We’d been in lockdown, and [that had been] the first time I could have a break and be at home around people that I love. It was the happiest I’d ever felt, and I didn’t realise that until I went back to work. I immediately became a different person. I had anxiety. Whenever we had a music video, I put an enormous amount of pressure on myself to try and lose weight. I have a fear of looking back on the camera. If I don’t like what I see, I find it so hard to be in front of the camera and feel amazing and perform.

I’d been in lockdown, and I’d put on a bit of weight but I didn’t care.And [then] they said, "You’ve got a music video in a couple of weeks," and I just panicked. I went on this extreme diet, with bloody shakes, and tried to eat as little as possible. On the day of the Sweet Melody video I had a panic attack on set because I didn’t look how I wanted to look and I found it so hard to just be happy and enjoy myself. I looked at the other three and they were having the time of their life.

I get so jealous, because I want to feel like that and enjoy it, because music is my passion. To have this dream and not be enjoying it because of what I look like, I knew wasn’t normal. 

There’s a scene in Sweet Melody I’m not in, because that’s when I had a panic attack and broke down. I was like,"I just want to go home." I was sobbing in the dressing room. Someone really close to me said, "This has got to stop. You can’t keep doing this to yourself. You’re going to end up where you were before."

For me, that was the pinnacle point. I was like, "I need to start taking care of myself now, because this isn’t healthy." It wasn’t nice for the other three to be around someone who didn’t want to be there. So I took a break. I went through a really dark time after the music video. My mum said, "This has got to stop now. I have seen you suffer too much. This has been 10 years of your life." 

For so long, I worried about others and letting people down. The only person I should have been trying to make happy was myself, and I wasn’t doing that. I needed to do it for my mental health, because I know I would have ended up back where I was five years ago, and that’s scary.

Edited by Gimme More
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  • Gimme More changed the title to Jesy reveals why she left Little Mix
Gimme More

Music is my life. It’s so powerful for me. I’m in the studio just having fun. I loved the music I made with Little Mix, but it wasn’t the kind of music I listen to. It just feels so nice to be making music that I love. I don’t know when I’m going to bring it out. I feel really content and happy. It’s the weirdest, best feeling in the world.

FELICITY: Can you give me three words that represented you in Little Mix and three that represent you now?

JESY: In Little Mix: honest, hardworking, sad.

FELICITY: And now?

JESY: Honest, content, free.

FELICITY: What did you do the day after you left Little Mix?

JESY: I was at home with my family, taking everything in on the news. Everyone was talking about it on Lorraine. When I put up my statement, I turned off my comments because I was shitting myself – I thought, “I’m going to get so much backlash for this.” My sister rang me and said, “I think you should turn on your comments. Everything I’ve seen is really positive.” 

I turned on my comments and just sat in bed and cried because I was overwhelmed with how lovely everyone was being. It was a shock to me. I couldn’t get over how much people were supporting me and understood. I was on a weird rollercoaster of emotions. I felt sad, because it was 10 years of my life that I was giving up. I felt scared, like, “****, what’s going to happen now?”

At the same time, I had glimpses of happiness, of, "I can do what I want now.” I don’t feel trapped. If I wanted to go to the ****ing shop today and eat 10 bars of Dairy Milk, I could, because I don’t have to worry about being on a diet any more. I don’t have to worry
about having a music video or doing an interview wearing an outfit that I don’t want to wear because three other girls want to wear it.

FELICITY: And then you feel like you’re being difficult?

JESY: Yeah. And it’s horrible. I felt like I was coming into an environment, sometimes, where people didn’t want me to be there.Sometimes I wasn’t a positive energy because I was so down. When you feel that way anyway, to be around certain people on my team that didn’t want me there was hard.

Edited by Gimme More
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JESY: I feel like there have been a few people who don’t understand why I left Little Mix, but am now in the studio making music. A lot of people said,“I thought you came out of the band to focus on your mental health?” I never said when I put out my statement that I was coming out of the band to never be in the public eye or perform again, or do music. I said
I was coming out of the band because I genuinely couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in a girl band.

For people to think that I would just stop working completely is crazy, because[for] me, working on my mental health is going to the studio, and creating music that I love. That’s what clears my head and makes me happy. It’s good for my mental health. I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the girl group. It wasn’t that I couldn’t deal with the pressure of being in the spotlight. I was constantly compared to three other girls and
that mentally drove me to a really dark place, and I couldn’t put myself through that any more.

I need to do things that make me happy now, and people might think that’s selfish, but sometimes in life you have to put yourself first, you have to love yourself, and do what makes you happy.

jesynelson-cosmopolitan-uk-interview-end

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I’m confused, she’s been teasing music since like the week after she left the band, cryptic captions and commenting to fans “sooner than you think 🙊🙈” and now it’s “yeah just doing some things, dunno when I’ll drop it though” 

 

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Just now, lestyoufall said:

Sorry but her goals are to perform solo & win a solo award? She really thinks she was the Beyoncé of the group smh

you're trash read the interview and educate yourself on her struggles with mental health.

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Luna Lovegood

at least the girls are on good terms and that’s all that matters honestly I wish her and the girls the very best in life 

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Gimme More
25 minutes ago, bionic said:

I really feel for her and understand her decisions for leaving. This quoted bit will never change (and will probably be escalated as a solo artist). I hope she has found the peace she needs and deserves

The full interview is sad, she said the breaking point was the Sweet Melody music video.

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/entertainment/a36185652/jesy-nelson-cosmopolitan-uk-june-cover/

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lestyoufall
19 minutes ago, Gimme More said:

you're trash read the interview and educate yourself on her struggles with mental health.

I don’t care enough about her to read the full interview :kiss:

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Well, as long as they‘re on good terms & she‘s happy - that’s what matters. 

Maybe she will join back again in 30 years for Little Mix: Jazz & Piano Residency in London :sis: 

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