My girl became the youngest trans toddler… at just three years of age

[Miracle 14,068]

13 hours ago, dynamite said:

What does it matter what I am? It's good that the parents have an open mind or whatever but this is another level. 

This child is (edit: was) THREE, why the need for any of this? Let them dress and live however they want the same as any other child. I used to wear my sister's dresses and collect lampshades obsessively, if my mother overly encouraged it and ascribed labels at an age where they didn't need to exist who knows what would have done to me, maybe it would have made me think I was something I was not. As it stands I'm not trans and kids can feel a lot of things but how much do they know about themselves or the world? They have barely lived. We go through a LOT especially in those years. Sorry but I'm not going to become some fake 'yes yes' bitch and throw all rationale out the window like sure Jan let your kid potentially believe they are something they may end up not being in 12 months. I mean it's not like the whole process isn't traumatic for many trans people to go through physically and emotionally so why welcome an unnecessary pain if it can be avoided...

If they actually end up being trans at an older age then sure, support them.

Obviously they're not actually transitioning now, no doctor would agree to it, fortunately.

Let kids be kids. 

Did you feel like a woman? If you parents had acknowledged your transness at a young you might have just transitioned. Maybe you have assumed social stereotypes that your parents gave to you for labelling you as a man and now you are not living your truest self. You will never know, but if your child says she's a girl (by the way she's not 3 anymore and that still holds true), why not treat her as a girl? Even if you did that, the possibilies of the child turning trans if they really aren't trans are minimal.

 

[Xoxo Adriana 15,040]

definitely too young.

This isn't being transphobic, as I myself come under the same umbrella, but 3 is just wayyyy too young. I have a three year old niece who can't even decide what she wants to eat, and isn't even 100% fluent in speech, so how can a three year old become trans unless it was decided on by the parent?

I had my gender struggles as a kid and believe me the best thing to do is let our kids make the decision when they're older and mature enough to do so. My mum was always supportive and what she did was allowed me to be the boy I was but also bought me a mix of "boy" and "girl" toys as well.

let kids be kids 

 

[AdmistTheLight 2,269]

Geezz, yeah for sure let the kid lives and be supported of who they are, but it is too soon to put a label on it. When I was their age I changed my mind every five minute.

Maybe, they are a gay male who like feminine clothes or drags or maybe they are just a straight male who like pink and dresses and think only girl can like that, and yes, maybe they are a trans girl. Just be there for them and wait for the kid to grow into their own.

You know what happens to be people being woke 24/7? They die of exhaustion.

[dynamite 66,661]

23 minutes ago, Miracle said:

Did you feel like a woman? If you parents had acknowledged your transness at a young you might have just transitioned. Maybe you have assumed social stereotypes that your parents gave to you for labelling you as a man and now you are not living your truest self. You will never know, but if your child says she's a girl (by the way she's not 3 anymore and that still holds true), why not treat her as a girl? Even if you did that, the possibilies of the child turning trans if they really aren't trans are minimal.

 

Nah I didn't, I just wanted to wear a dress and pretend to be Dorothy from Wizard of Oz lol   I feel totally comfortable in my own body luckily (gender wise, I just hate every other aspect of myself)

[Guest]

I'm trans and I knew I was trans when I was very very young. If this child knows they're trans or shows signs of being trans they should have the space to express that. If it turns out that later on they don't identify as trans then it's still good for the parents to let their child know that they will always accept them. I understand why people don't think this is okay, but it is. Kids can know more about themselves at three than adults  thirty years old can. People keep saying they need to be a kid without the labels, but would it be better if their childhood was spent in suffering and fearing expressing themselves? Maybe calling a child that young trans is too soon and the parents need to give their child time to figure it out themselves but the child still needs to space to express themselves freely without fear and judgement. There have been trans kids before who knew they were trans this young. Me and Jazz Jennings are a good example. We both just knew we were in the wrong body and were actually girls. This child may know too. 

Also this kid is seven now. Seven year olds can know. I knew very well I was trans at that age. Even though I did not know the word trans those feelings were still there. Many people knew they were gay or lesbian or bi at that age. I had my first girlfriend when I was six but no one questions that because I was viewed as a boy. People only question the authenticity of children's feelings if it does align with the cishet mindset. Children are smarter than people give them credit for. 

[RahrahWitch 6,985]

Kids are too young to fully understand what Trans even means. Especially this young. How can you claim to be something you can't even grasp the concept of?

Kids confuse Masculine and Feminine with Gender Identity a lot.  Things that are Considered Masculine and Feminine are put in place by society, There's no biology behind most of it. Liking "Girly" things and actually being a Girl are vastly different.

I believe around the mid to late teen years is when a Child would truly know the difference.

[Borislshere 53,665]

 

58 minutes ago, AdmistTheLight said:

Geezz, yeah for sure let the kid lives and be supported of who they are, but it is too soon to put a label on it. When I was their age I changed my mind every five minute.

Why is labeling it so bad though? Adding a label helps the child understand what they’re going through without thinking they’re some “weirdo” and it’s better than constantly misgendering them and calling them a boy in a dress. 

[Economy 52,861]

1 hour ago, Miracle said:

I just don't see the problem in actually acknowledging they don't feel like the gender assigned at birth. What happened to being born this way? Of course it's not the time for transition, but If a kid is unhappy with the label social services and the hospitsl put on them I don't see the problem in treating them as the gender they want to be?

I'm surprised a forum made up of 90 percent gay people are against this.

 

1 hour ago, Miracle said:

Transness is something that is genetically inherited.

We dont know for certain yet how all that works

 

tbh the whole “born this way” is a saying that may only partially be true

 

i dont believe genetics alone determine this. And theyve yet to discover any genes exclusive to gay or trans individuals. That doesnt mean there isnt a genetic factor or influence tho

 

But my opinion is that humans are far too complex with our minds and biology for something as complicated as our sexuality and sense of being to be determined by 1 factor alone (in this case genetics)

[Lilmonzter 2,864]

The problem with this is that you can't change your mind on it! Once you transition thats it! So is a 3 year old capable of making that decision or should the parents give heed to them at that age? 

Is this a valid question?  

[Lord Temptation 11,209]

Kids on drugs? Utterly despicable creating a junkie for life.

[Miracle 14,068]

25 minutes ago, Economy said:

 

We dont know for certain yet how all that works

 

tbh the whole “born this way” is a saying that may only partially be true

 

i dont believe genetics alone determine this. And theyve yet to discover any genes exclusive to gay or trans individuals. That doesnt mean there isnt a genetic factor or influence tho

 

But my opinion is that humans are far too complex with our minds and biology for something as complicated as our sexuality and sense of being to be determined by 1 factor alone (in this case genetics)

Transness is different to homosexuality.

[Economy 52,861]

18 minutes ago, Miracle said:

Transness is different to homosexuality.

I agree.

 

still tho. The scientific community has not yet come up with any definite answers as to what causes it

 

of course i have no right to tell u what to do as a parent

 

im just givingg u my 2 cents thats all. If it was my child i would let them express themselves the way they want without trying to force them to be more “masculine” or “feminine”...

 

but id also be cautious about about going as far as changing pronouns as early as 3 cuz at that age i just think its so hard to tell

 

i feel like i could be reinforcing something that if i didnt it could of turned out to be a phase that went away later and because i reinforce it, it never does...

 

And because society is such much harder on transgendered individuals and they have to live with so many hardships, id want to make sure if they are transgendered thats its 100% within them

 

i dont want to influence them to be that for life at only 3 years old when kids have so many phases that come and go

 

im not criticizing u. Its ur child. Im explaning why if it was me, i wouldnt encourage it THAT strongly so early

 

Again tho, i wouldnt scold them either. Id wait it out and see what happens to make sure that really is what they are and not some child phase

 

All im saying is especially before teenagehood children are constantly changing rapidly as they mature. This may or may not be something that lasts. I just dont think theres anyway for u to know now for certain

 

i wanted to be a girl from as early as I remember to maybe about 10 to 12 then i no longer wanted that. Im very happy to be a man and wouldnt want to be a woman

 

having changed how i personally felt growing up makes me feel iffy when parents at the age of 3, 4 or 5 etc seem to be convinced their child is transgendered. U just dont know that young i dont think 

[AdmistTheLight 2,269]

57 minutes ago, Borislshere said:

Why is labeling it so bad though? Adding a label helps the child understand what they’re going through without thinking they’re some “weirdo” and it’s better than constantly misgendering them and calling them a boy in a dress. 

I didn't say it is bad, I said it is too soon. Also I don't think indentity as trans will make them feel any less "weird", less isolated than "a boy who likes dresses" and I definitely don't say that just call him this label instead of that. Letting them know they can be anything they want is very different from "I will raise you as a girl from now on". In a perfect world, it's will be easy, but now, as much as we want to believe we are doing right thing for them, we don't know that. That is why I says be supportive but don't jump right into it, guide your kid, let them know there are options.

[Borislshere 53,665]

2 minutes ago, AdmistTheLight said:

I didn't say it is bad, I said it is too soon. Also I don't think indentity as trans will make them feel any less "weird", less isolated than "a boy who likes dresses" and I definitely don't say that just call him this label instead of that. Letting them know they can be anything they want is very different from "I will raise you as a girl from now on". In a perfect world, it's will be easy, but now, as much as we want to believe we are doing right thing for them, we don't know that. That is why I says be supportive but don't jump right into it, guide your kid, let them know there are options.

They didn't "jump right in" though. The child started having these feelings at the age of 3 and the mother waited 4 years before making any changes. They haven't done anything that isn't reversible. If she feels like she isn't trans anymore at anytime, they can stop. The mother is just doing what makes her child happy and comfortable.  The mom has been supportive and is guiding her kid into this. I'm sure she knows her options. 

[AdmistTheLight 2,269]

Just now, Borislshere said:

They didn't "jump right in" though. The child started having these feelings at the age of 3 and the mother waited 4 years before making any changes. They haven't done anything that isn't reversible. If she feels like she isn't trans anymore at anytime, they can stop. The mother is just doing what makes her child happy and comfortable.  The mom has been supportive and is guiding her kid into this. I'm sure she knows her options. 

You know what, I have been thinking, who am I to tell people how to raise their children. There are millions reasons to be against it but I, for once, will be an idealist. If the kid is happy, idgaf about the rest.