Joanne Will Snatch A Grammy

[PunkTheFunk 121,549]

Gaga is winning the Grammy for Best Pop Vocal Album this year. I can feel it in my bones.

Allow me to present my case:

Let's take a look at the nominees:

Coldplay – Kaleidoscope EP
Lana Del Rey – Lust for Life
Imagine Dragons – Evolve
Kesha – Rainbow
Lady Gaga – Joanne
Ed Sheeran – ÷

Right off the bat, we can eliminate Coldplay, Lana Del Rey, and Imagine Dragons, because there's no way in hell they're winning -- just trust me on this.

That leaves Gaga, Kesha, and Ed. 

 Reason #1 why Gaga will win: She is performing

The Grammy for Pop Vocal album was first awarded once in 1968, and then every year from 1995 onwards. Since this isn't a general field category, I wanted to see whether or not it was shown during the TV broadcast each year, whether the winner was present at or somehow involved in the ceremony if it was telecast, and who won AOTY that year. You'll understand my reasoning in a moment.

I could only find proper schedules of the Grammy ceremonies from 2011 onwards, so we'll just go with that. Let's take a look:

Two interesting things to notice from my sh!tty Excel screencap:

 First, the winner of Best Pop Vocal since 2011 has either performed during the ceremony, or presented an award (in the case of Bruno in 2014). In any case, they've shown up to the ceremony, so this knocks out Ed Bitter-an (who is supposedly boycotting). After being completely snubbed from the major categories + all the comments he made during the December voting period about not caring about awards, I wouldn't be surprised if the Academy was like "ok sweaty, might as well give this award to someone who will appreciate it "

 Second, in the years Pop Vocal Album wasn't broadcast on TV, the winner of the category won AOTY too. So what does this tell us? It tells us that the Grammys know exactly who is winning each category, and adjust the TV broadcast accordingly. Keep this in mind for Reason #2. This is not the Oscars where the same categories are announced each year and the results are hidden in top secret briefcases.

For example, after the voting finished in 2017 the academy saw that Adele had won both Pop Vocal and AOTY, so they thought "it would be a waste of broadcast time to award her twice for the same album...let's cut Pop Vocal and only show AOTY. BUT we need to show Beyonce winning something or her hive will be after us, so we'll throw a random category she wins like Best Urban Contemporary Album into the broadcast."

Since there is no overlap between Pop Vocal Album and AOTY this year, the award is being presented for sure. 

Which brings me to the second reason why she's winning.

 Reason #2: Not only is Gaga performing, but she is doing so in the first hour of the broadcast

This tweet apparently confirms the performers for the first hour of the show (it's 3 hours in total).

So why does this matter?

Notice how no one else nominated for Best Pop Vocal Album is performing in the first hour. Also remember that Gaga is performing a medley of songs a track from Joanne.

I think we are in for a Beyonce 2017 situation: she performed near the beginning of last year's ceremony, and was presented with Best Urban Contemporary Album soon after that (the only award she was presented with during the night). No one else from her category (Rihanna, Anderson .Paak, Gallant, or KING) performed in the first hour or performed at all. 

We can safely assume that Kesha (who I think will win Pop Solo) will be performing sometime during the remaining two hours of the show. 

It all makes sense to me: she performs a song from the album, people enjoy it and say "wow what a great album!", and then when they present her with the award the audience will be like "yeah she definitely deserved it". All in all, I just have a really good feeling about this.

DISCLAIMER: PunkTheFunk shall not be held liable for any meltdowns or damages caused as a result of Gaga potentially losing the Grammy to Ted Sheeran on Sunday. Please keep your hype at responsible levels.

[JustinLovesGaga 883]

Omg thank you for all of these receipts. I know they better not award Edward after what he said/implied  

[migamiga 12,073]

i’m still recovering from bankruptcy because i bet all my money on the 2016 oscar 

[bloody g 31,731]

Just now, F AM E said:

i’m still recovering from bankruptcy because i bet all my money on the 2016 oscar 

Me also literally goals

[KyliesChild 16,907]

I have a feeling Joanne will win simply because out of all of the other nominees, Gaga has a fair balance between critical acclaim and commercial success. Kesha's "Rainbow" is by far the most critically acclaimed album of the nominees, however her musical endeavors were not as represented in the media as Gaga was. Divide is by far more successful commercially than the rest of the categories, however he was shunned by the media for the most part—his constant boasts about his commercial success doesn't help either. 

[KyliesChild 16,907]

I'm not sure why Coldplay is qualified to be nominated since he submitted an EP to an album category. 

[Pop Music 20,522]

She will win. if not I will sue the recording academy for poor music taste.

[moonsago 5,378]

Bitchhhhh this was indepth, you went out and searched for the receipts yassss. Honestly I feel like she’s getting both awards I just feel it deep down in my bus*y and I had a dream about ittttt

but where did it get confirmed she’s doingg a medley?????????? Is this for sure????? I am shookkkkkk

[PunkTheFunk 121,549]

1 minute ago, Skai Jackson said:

I'm not sure why Coldplay is qualified to be nominated since he submitted an EP to an album category. 

TFM was nominated for AOTY despite being an EP 

[Contrapoints 6,146]

Did you actually make an excel sheet for the Grammy's? Slay 

[PunkTheFunk 121,549]

4 minutes ago, moonsago said:

but where did it get confirmed she’s doingg a medley?????????? Is this for sure????? I am shookkkkkk

I think it said somewhere she's singing "songs" from Joanne? 

Let me find a receipt

EDIT: @moonsago nvm it's just a "track"  But my point still stands

https://www.businesswire.com/news/home/20180104005456/en/GRAMMY®-Nominees-Childish-Gambino-Lady-Gaga-Big

[PunkTheFunk 121,549]

Just now, Haiii said:

Did you actually make an excel sheet for the Grammy's? Slay 

I love an Excel sheet

[KyliesChild 16,907]

Just now, PunkTheFunk said:

TFM was nominated for AOTY despite being an EP 

I was thinking of that when I posted it but technically it should've been allowed to be nominated because it was sold with The Fame in some countries and the time-length exceeds 30 minutes unlike Coldplay's EP. 

 

[ryanripley 86,575]

im stealing this gif

[GypsyVida 5,873]

I live for an excel sheet. 

I record receipts on my excel.