Anyone else having a hard time listening to Chromatica’s heavier songs?

[DiamondAngel 5,044]

First of all, let me say I LOVE Chromatica. I think it’s her best album since ARTPOP and her most focused work since Born This Way. That being said, I think that, in my own personal life narrative, the album came a bit too late for me.

The past year and a half have been very illuminating for me and I’ve struggled with quite a lot. The past few months, I’ve finally been able to face some of these monsters head-on, and quarantine has helped me accelerate this process as I haven’t felt the pressure to be working or having a social life. I’ve been able to dedicate a lot of time to healing. So I was looking forward to an album about dancing through the pain.

But some of the songs are a little too close for comfort almost? Gaga has always written about her pain and trauma, but in a more metaphorical way. On Chromatica, she’s very direct. I’ve never had such emotional reactions to her work before. 911 is a chilling portrait of what it’s like to rely on a substance for happiness; Replay captures the hyper-panicky feeling of living with inescapable pain day after day; Fun Tonight is like a plea to oneself to be better; and Alice, with the lyrics “where’s my body, I’m trapped in my mind” and the metaphor of falling down the rabbit hole reminds me of panic attacks. These issues are things I’ve been struggling with but have recently been able to overcome. I really could have used these songs months ago, but now, I don’t want to dance through that pain. I’m sort of ready to let go of it and dance to joy instead.

I’m just speaking out loud here but wondering if anyone else can understand this. Unfortunately 911 and Replay are two of my faves from the album, but they’re very uncomfortable to listen to. That being said, parts of Chromatica are so joyous and happy (Free Woman, Stupid Love, Love Me Right, Sour Candy, Enigma, and Babylon) and they are giving me life! I love this album regardless and even the songs that are hard for me to listen to are still amazing. 

I’m so glad Gaga is exploring her pain through music and working through it in this way, and I’ll always support her as an artist. But I usually listen to music that I can relate to at the present moment. And presently, I’m a lighter mood, despite the state of the world. 

(and even though it’s hard to listen to I’m still #Team911asNextSingle)

[PlasticDollGirl 1,236]

Yeah I understand what you’re saying, tbh I relate to most of the album lyrically, it’s actually helped me the last few days. 

[Spyro 8,438]

Not gonna lie, I don't get emotional easily.  When I heard 911 for the first time I got chills and kinda had a "me" moment.  If that makes sense?  I usually get over it if I replay.mp3 it over and over again.

[Spyro 8,438]

Also #Team911asNextSingle

[Hebi 13,928]

SAME I sometimes cry when I listen to Replay, 1000 Doves, Alice, 911, etc.. I thought the songs were going to heal me but they make me feel worse AND bop to it at the same time? lol, she wasn't lying when said "dancing through pain". I don't complain about it anyways, it's what we got

[DiamondAngel 5,044]

Just now, Spyro said:

Not gonna lie, I don't get emotional easily.  When I heard 911 for the first time I got chills and kinda had a "me" moment.  If that makes sense?  I usually get over it if I replay.mp3 it over and over again.

I was the same way! I remember freaking out because omg, TFM-Gaga was back, she was serving electropop vocals, I was freaking out in my room. And then I was like.... oh. Earlier this year I relied on weed too much and would get high most nights. Thankfully I only smoke once a week now, but I was just taken aback by the lyrics. It’s my favorite song on the album in terms of melody and production but I usually skip it because it’s too real. But I rarely get emotional with songs. 

[Guest ARTPOPSlays]

I totally get what u are saying. 911 hits close to gone for me as well. I do take medication, wouldn’t say I’m super dependent on them. Although, almost daily I’ll get back and neck pain which causes a headache and getting lightheaded and I always take a pain killer to help and have some type of ritual that will help to get rid of it and 911 reminds me of the pain I experience almost daily and just needing it to ****ing stop. Usually happens when I’m spiraling in my thoughts. Also, I don’t smoke weed by myself, I barely do it and only do it with one of my cousins occasionally. But I was depressed a few months ago and was wannng to do it every time we hung out. But learning that it won’t fix anything because one time I smoked and still wanted to just go home and be alone but couldn’t 

Alice also hits very close to home. Especially as of lately, with current events. But just in general I’ve never felt like I’m from here and am always yearning to find a place where we are all equal and can feel safe. I get emotional when she says Take Me Home. Because this is suppose to be home but it doesn’t always feels that way. 

Replay just reminds me of how I tell myself old stories and let myself relive situations because of those old stories. 

Fun Tonight reminds me of last year when I was really depressed and would be hanging out with my cousins who I’m super close too but I’d almost be numbing my pain by being super sarcastic (which I naturally am) but wouldn’t stop because I had nothing else I’d want to talk about. 

Even sour candy! Super personal although you wouldn’t think so. Reminds me of how I have a hard time developing friendships and relationships outside of my family. I’m hard on the outside but if you give me time then I could make time for your love. I feel like someone has to show me that they’re deserving of a more vulnerable side to me. 

Plastic doll reminds me of how I don’t fit in anywhere at all. How I’ll never really fit in to whatever current narrative the media tells us to believe or follow.

yeah this album is super personal for me and I almost didn’t realize it until I typed this out. It’s a very self aware album and it’s helped me come to terms with my emotions and dance through them. To radically accept them and be okay with my pain in order to still enjoy life. Damn I feel like I need to talk to my therapist 

[DiamondAngel 5,044]

5 minutes ago, ARTPOPSlays said:

I totally get what u are saying. 911 hits close to gone for me as well. I do take medication, wouldn’t say I’m super dependent on them. Although, almost daily I’ll get back and neck pain which causes a headache and getting lightheaded and I always take a pain killer to help and have some type of ritual that will help to get rid of it and 911 reminds me of the pain I experience almost daily and just needing it to ****ing stop. Usually happens when I’m spiraling in my thoughts. Also, I don’t smoke weed by myself, I barely do it and only do it with one of my cousins occasionally. But I was depressed a few months ago and was wannng to do it every time we hung out. But learning that it won’t fix anything because one time I smoked and still wanted to just go home and be alone but couldn’t 

Alice also hits very close to home. Especially as of lately, with current events. But just in general I’ve never felt like I’m from here and am always yearning to find a place where we are all equal and can feel safe. I get emotional when she says Take Me Home. Because this is suppose to be home but it doesn’t always feels that way. 

Replay just reminds me of how I tell myself old stories and let myself relive situations because of those old stories. 

Fun Tonight reminds me of last year when I was really depressed and would be hanging out with my cousins who I’m super close too but I’d almost be numbing my pain by being super sarcastic (which I naturally am) but wouldn’t stop because I had nothing else I’d want to talk about. 

Even sour candy! Super personal although you wouldn’t think so. Reminds me of how I have a hard time developing friendships and relationships outside of my family. I’m hard on the outside but if you give me time then I could make time for your love. I feel like someone has to show me that they’re deserving of a more vulnerable side to me. 

Plastic doll reminds me of how I don’t fit in anywhere at all. How I’ll never really fit in to whatever current narrative the media tells us to believe or follow.

yeah this album is super personal for me and I almost didn’t realize it until I typed this out. It’s a very self aware album and it’s helped me come to terms with my emotions and dance through them. To radically accept them and be okay with my pain in order to still enjoy life. Damn I feel like I need to talk to my therapist 

This is a beautiful analysis of your relationship with the record. I am so glad it’s helping you accept your pain though! I think that’s exactly what Gaga intended

[MEM 3,114]

I hear you OP. It’s actually quite a lyrically dark album covered by uplifting production, but I think that just speaks to real life. We exist with joy and sadness simultaneously, what matters is how we deal with it...

Next time you listen to those tracks, try and focus on the beats and production rather than the lyrics. That helps me 

[LaLa 19,655]

I'm an emo girl at heart, I love a song that stabs me in the gut  

[Guest ARTPOPSlays]

12 minutes ago, DiamondAngel said:

This is a beautiful analysis of your relationship with the record. I am so glad it’s helping you accept your pain though! I think that’s exactly what Gaga intended

It’s so beautiful what music can do, especially when your connected to an artist. This past year has been a big journey for me mentally, been coming to so many realizations and the record has helped me understand so much of it 

[DiamondAngel 5,044]

Update: I have overcome this with Replay, it’s too good not to bop to

[Creyk 17,817]

I had this with a few songs yet, but the catchiness of the melodies makes it impossible to stay away. It's like pleasure and pain rolled into one.