Ultimate 'Joanne marketing strategy'

[malazam 15,710]

As a member of 'GGD scamming group' I must make you aware of the ultimate marketing strategy to make JOANNE a commercial success, since Gaga's not doing promo and cancelling everything, we must take the game and do her job.

In the next steps you'll know how to promote JOANNE in a better way than Gaga.

1 - Make sure you don't have criminal records, if you do, look for someone that doesn't.

2 - Wait 3 days after JOANNE release and go to a physical store (Target, Best Buy, Indie music stores, Farm stores)

3 - Steal half -or more- of the Joanne copies you see there.

 

Here's the thing, getting caught or not, your local news are going to talk about that. -Better promo than Gaga has been doing-

 

4 - If you get caught, you'll probably be interviewed, you need to take advantage of that and promote the Hell out of Joanne and -ARTPOP if you have the time-

5 - You'll happily spend a little time in jail but you'll be out before the Super Bowl performance, which won't be cancelled because Joanne is going to sell 5 million.

 

Spoiler

Joanne verison of a Brazilian joke about promoting Glory. Don't do this or do it 

Bye

[boobtank 9,090]

I'm in... ready for my close up girls. See you on Channel 5 news this time next week.

 

[Impostor 4,114]

Is that our new big strategy? Will the little thieves beat the soccer moms?

[Varo Yan 2,984]

little manager try to speak with Bobby 

[prince 4,688]

[MaryJaneHolland 77,348]

Local news dont talk about stolen CDs 

[SychosSoChic 9,995]

I love robbery

 

[Dramatica 13,311]

Tbh if someone is gonna break into a Target store. They better do it now, leak Joanne and then promote it in jail while getting raped by big dudes.

[viniferrett 16,683]

1 minute ago, MaryJaneHolland said:

Local news dont talk about stolen CDs 

we have to kill someone 

 

[prince 4,688]

Just now, Gaga of Time said:

Tbh if someone is gonna break into a Target store. They better do it now, leak Joanne and then promote it in jail while getting raped by big dudes.

 

[malazam 15,710]

1 minute ago, MaryJaneHolland said:

Local news dont talk about stolen CDs 

I live in Uruguay, in a city which has 20k people and there's a satanic clown on the loose, I mean, a massive CD steal is going to be shown 

It's a joke tho

[Lona Delery 7,180]

15 minutes ago, MaryJaneHolland said:

Local news dont talk about stolen CDs 

Our news even reports when cigarettes worth at least ~1000$ gets stolen. So theres definitely a possibility 👀

[Delusional Aura 5,129]

Or she could just release that sex tape with @Bradley Cooper

[Patamon 1,375]

1 hour ago, malazam said:

3 - Steal half -or more- of the Joanne copies you see there.

 

Here's the thing, getting caught or not, your local news are going to talk about that. -Better promo than Gaga has been doing-

 

4 - If you get caught, you'll probably be interviewed, you need to take advantage of that and promote the Hell out of Joanne and -ARTPOP if you have the time-

 

My fave post on GGD.

[PassTheTime 1,448]

54 minutes ago, malazam said:

if you have the time-

 

 

Yes I might even  go with the cops to Ellen's couch and give an interview