Bisexuality and Gaga

[Shadow 6,062]

I'm curious about this dilemma that most bis-xuals seem to have, illustrated by Lady Gaga's relationship with the gay community.

Even after everything she has done for the gays, supporting their causes, speaking out for them, and doing charities to help and even when Gaga comes out saying that she's bis-xual on more than one occasion and interview, it still seems that certain gay folk do not consider her included in their community.

I don't get it. Bis-xuals get it from both sides. Too gay for straights or not gay enough for gays. But they are both, attracted to both. It's how they are, were born.

What do you think?

[Tokyo Rose 1,475]

If I'm 100% honest, I don't really understand bis-xuals myself. 

 

I'm just so used to being attracted to only one gender, so I can't imagine what it would be like to be attracted to both.

 

Plus, she basically said she could only be *in love* with a man. So that makes it even more confusing.. 

[carrot stick 0]

I think it's because she has never been open about dating another woman, it comes across as the 'I Kissed A Girl' thing with Katy Perry, where people think you are saying it to get attention. 

[kaojen 1,571]

I think it sucks being bi (hello people, I am too). Just because she's with a man means that she's straight now in the eyes of the world, including the gay community. But that isn't stopping her s-xual attraction to both genders.

 

I also get crap from my own friends. I'm bi and getting married to a girl next month. So now I'm automatically a lesbian because I'm marrying one? It's called committment people. Just like my bestie being married to a guy doesn't mean she stopped being attracted to the ladies. It's bull**** and I can attest to dealing with this treatment myself.

 

Also, some people think Gaga lies about being s-xually attracted to women. 

 

I also think that people can be bis-xual but NOT biromantic. As in s-xually attracted to both genders, would and could have s-x with either, but are only romantically involved with one gender. To me, bis-xuality has more to do with what you are attracted to, and less to do with who you actually date. Obviously, if you are homos-xual, you can only be homoromantic, since you wouldn't even dream of being romantic with someone you couldn't be with s-xually lol.

 

Thus ends my rant. The b---h is bi. Deal with it. The lgbt community needs to accept everyone included in their acronym. I'm sick of it.

[Asia 269]

YAS SUPPORT US

[Ascetic 0]

I mean I can tell you that being attracted to vaginas, boobs, and penises is a wonderful experience because you get to experience the beauty of human s-xuality from both genders. But she's actually been open about the strippers and sleeping with women I thought?

[Helix 1,360]

I think it's because bis-xual people can /technically/ get married in all states (if they marry the opposite s-x)

I've had gay people say to me "You don't count, you can get married anywhere! I can't! You don't understand me!" and Of course i ****ing don't. I'm not them so I'll never fully understand them but Its like people don't see that you can be bi and lean towards the same s-x.

I don't know, a lot of people don't "believe" or "understand" bis-xuals and it makes no sense? It's like "I need to see you with both genders to accept you" and thats so stupid.

I think it's just that these overdramatic gay ****heads just want to demean what Gaga has done for them and that they don't want to accept that MAYBE someone of that much influence was ALSO doing it for themself.

 

And also I think they don't get that you can be bis-xual and can be PHYSICALLY attracted to both genders, but not romantically attracted to both. Which might be Gaga's case and that's why they don't except it

[rubytuesday 24]

I think you're spot on!  

 

People who identify as bis-xual (or other nonbinary identities) tend to be rejected from both straight people and the gay community and are often asked to "prove" their s-xuality due to the belief that bis-xuals are actually either straight or gay and simply calling themselves bi for attention or other reasons.  There are tons of negative stereotypes and attitudes about people who identify as nonbinary (they're promiscuous, "I'd never date one because there's too much competition/because they've been with the opposite/same gender!", "I don't get it, they're weird!" etc.)  Thinking this way is actually a LOT more common than you'd think, even within the gay community and specifically on GGD... I've seen a lot of negativity about bis-xuality here (and every identity that's not "cis gay male" ) which is especially sad considering Gaga identifies as bis-xual.

 

Many people here still deny how Gaga identifies herself.  It's always tough watching some interviews with her because she's been asked so many times before to speak about her s-xual experiences with women to "prove" that she's bis-xual  :roll:

 

The B and T in LGBT are invisible depending on who you're talking to.

[Anomaly 122]

I don't think the situation is necessarily limited to "bis-xuals." There's just a certain portion of homos-xuals who feel that they don't need this random pop star acting as their spoke person. Some homos-xuals just genuinely don't like her as well, and do think she's a rip off of Madonna or perhaps just milking the homos-xual community to gain publicity. Many people also believe(d) that she is not truly bis-xual and that she just says it to be considered part of their community. They think that since she is a woman who is primarily attracted to men, she doesn't understand what it's like to be a homos-xual and to haver endured the struggles they have endured. It goes back to that notion of a pop star being a spokesperson for a minority group. That being said, plenty of straight up "gays" don't like Gaga nor do they welcome her into their community for those same reasons. It has nothing to do with bis-xuality, really, but more of a sense of unrelatability, I presume. She's a pop star standing in the center of the spotlight, in a relationship with a man, just as most of her other primary relationships have been. Those people who do not consider Gaga part of their community feel that she can't relate in that aspect because she is in a healthy relationship with the opposite gender and has had a majority of her relationships with that gender for the entirety of her life, thus not having to deal with the same alienation that they had to deal with. The spotlight makes everything ten times heavier as well. Since she is such a public figure, her role in the situation is immediately subject to debate.

[Helix 1,360]

If I'm 100% honest, I don't really understand bis-xuals myself. 

 

I'm just so used to being attracted to only one gender, so I can't imagine what it would be like to be attracted to both.

 

Plus, she basically said she could only be *in love* with a man. So that makes it even more confusing.. 

Well if you're bis-xual then that means you're attracted to both genders but it doesn't necessarily mean you want to have a long term relationship with both.

Some people enjoy the physical side of a relationship with both genders, but only like the romantic side with one gender. 

[kaojen 1,571]

If I'm 100% honest, I don't really understand bis-xuals myself. 

 

I'm just so used to being attracted to only one gender, so I can't imagine what it would be like to be attracted to both.

 

Plus, she basically said she could only be *in love* with a man. So that makes it even more confusing.. 

 

It goes like this. I'm bis-xual. I find men and women s-xually attractive. I could have s-x with either. I am romantically involved with a women and am committed to her. I do not stop being bis-xual. 

Gaga is bis-xual in the factor that she finds both genders s-xually appealing. She has had s-x with both and enjoyed it, and continues to be s-xually attracted to both genders. However, she did not have a romantic relationship with a woman. She may never if she ends up with Taylor, but that doesn't omit her s-xual attraction to both genders.

 

I have two terms for you 

bis-xual = s-xually attracted to both genders

biromantic = can be romantically attached with both genders

You can be bis-xual without being biromantic in my opinion, and that is what I imagine Gaga to be. :)

 

Just because you don't understand something, doesn't mean that those that identify that way don't deserve your acknowledgement and respect. <---- sound familiar?

[Tokyo Rose 1,475]

Just because you don't understand something, doesn't mean that those that identify that way don't deserve your acknowledgement and respect. <---- sound familiar?

 

Of course I accept bis-xuals. I was just trying to explain how it can be hard to understand sometimes.

[Sabertooth 2]

Its like Bis-xual is middle of the road, while everyone else is left or right.

[EdgeofTeeth 1,934]

Bis-xuality is a real thing that a lot of people like to deny as legitimate. I'm bi, and I'd say most bis-xuals don't necessarily like both genders the same. For example, I'm attracted to guys more, but I still find girls attractive and like doing things with them.

[pink sushi 4,351]

I think Gaga needs to get with Tara. :crossed: