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The White House Pits Gaga Against Beyonce


lazygaga

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The Hunger Games are real.

 

It is now tradition that each year, the president will pardon one turkey from becoming Thanksgiving dinner. So far, 23 turkeys have been pardoned by POTUSes over the year. Last year, the turkey that President Obama pardoned was named Cobbler.

 

But this year, the White House is doing something different: They're asking you to vote on which tribute turkey should be pardoned. And which should be murdered. For all of our amusement.

Just kiddingâ€â€that would be heartless (even if we are voting to save one turkey while we feast on million others). The White House explains, "Both turkeys will be pardoned, but only the American people will decide which bird takes the title." But you're still a Capitol citizen, so adjust your wig and tell these turkeys, "May the odds be ever in your favor."

Now decide: Are you #TeamCaramel or #TeamPopcorn? Here are their stats:

Caramel is almost five months old, weighs in at 38 pounds and stands two feet tall. His favorite food is soybeans and he's a self-proclaimed Little Monster (apparently his favorite song is "Bad Romance"). He has a "quick, clear and frequent" gobble.
 

On the other hand, Popcorn is the same age, but he is a little shorter and lighter (he's 1' 11" tall and 37 pounds). Popcorn loves corn, "Halo" by Beyoncé and has a "more garbled, longer notes" gobble.

 

As of publishing time, Popcorn has more votes on Facebook. But who knows how this will end? Caramel and Popcorn might pretend to fall in love and threaten to stuff themselves and Obama will end up pardoning them both.

 

What even...

   

 

 

happy thanksgiving! 

 

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