CEREMONY | artRATE: the ARTPOP rate

[Donatellah 922]

This song will remain underrated and that's okay

[Auralegends 2,827]

J&D at the bottom

"Pretends to be shocked" 

Spoiler

 

[Donatellah 922]

Jewels N Drugs has one of her best instrumentals but nobody's ready to accept that

[Ophelia 3,709]

JnD has amazing instrumental, but it's out of place, thats it

[PMM 1,952]

15 is a place for Dope

[Gorehound 2,216]

 

Hey guys I've just landed! And I'm ready for the celebrations. Cheers! 

 

[Auralegends 2,827]

1 minute ago, Donatellah said:

Jewels N Drugs has one of her best instrumentals but nobody's ready to accept that

Sine From Above and Perfect Illusion say hi 

[Nite 2,988]

If Dope isn't 15 then probably 14 

[Cruelty 5,887]

CAKE LIKE LADY GAGA – average 5.99

The highs: 10 x 8 [ @littlepotter @Onlygaga @artdoll @phantasmas @maymay @TXNNXTUS @sillynate @leedeegaga]

The lows: 1 x 7 [ @Bronco @The Fame Monster @ImMatt @Jose Alberto @nodandsmile @Gorehound @bionic]

Something that gets lost a little when we talk about ARTPOP is just how fun it was. ‘Fun’ is a word that comes up a lot in Gaga & DJ White Shadow’s interviews from 2013, with the latter describing the album as “just supposed to be fun music with meaning”. The featherweight frolic of ‘Cake’, which sees Gaga stunting over a rough-n-ready trap beat, is a great example of this.

As DJWS explained, the track was created as a birthday present for Gaga, inspired by the hip-hop & trap music they liked listening to on the tour bus. ‘Cake’ was then subject to a curious release strategy, whereby DJWS announced an entirely illegitimate contest to record a verse over his instrumental, & then Little Monsters immediately pitched up the ‘winning entry’ to discover that the rapper was Gaga herself.

‘Cake’ clearly isn’t album-worthy, & feels distinctly unlike a typical Gaga song—I tend to agree with @JazzGa's assessment that “Gaga is not ‘posted in the trap, strap with the AK’ nor does she need to be”. But as a little side project that doesn’t take itself too seriously, it’s a tasty enough morsel.

Comments:

Spoiler

@Bronco This track reminds me how little I miss my tumblr era….

@ALittleMonsta i think the lyrics were by a fan of a competition that djws did i think and they recorded it. you have to admit the lyrics are so funny but the song is very confident and strong

@TheSine Let’s be honest, I wish I had cake like Lady Gaga.

@Onlygaga I remember knowing every single word to this song because I would play it on repeat!! Such a good way to keep us fed while waiting for AP!

@allanrocks I weirdly like it, but I’m happy it didn’t make the final cut.

@ImMatt Sorry...it's dreadful.

@JazzGa More fun awesome campy lyrics! But seriously these studio dudes need to stop telling Gaga that doing hip hop stuff will make her more popular. Gaga is not "posted in the trap, strap with the AK" nor does she need to be, and I prefer her that way thanku

@TwistedTeeth Way out of Gaga's wheel house, but she sounds like she had fun with it. It gives me the same vibes as her song Christmas Tree. She's just here for a good time.

@whoresup Funny and non-serious, a fabulous diss track.

@dimitristhe I know some monsters hate this song, but come on now, it’s funny and that’s the purpose of its existence. 

@TXNNXTUS With some polishing, badass

@Tobcho why isn't it on the tracklist again? Honestly what a tune, melodically and bravado-wise it vomits delicious undigested chocolate raspberry cake (that's my pick, what's yours?) on 80% of this album. 

@ARTGOD Eh, it’s a good novelty track. A taste of what a more hip hop focused ARTPOP would’ve sounded like.

[Ophelia 3,709]

also @Crueltydid you get my votes? I don't see my comment  or maybe I didn't comment on JnD at all? hmmmmmm

[Donatellah 922]

Just now, Auralegends said:

Sine From Above and Perfect Illusion say hi 

just to be ignored

[Juliandante 68]

5 minutes ago, Cruelty said:

15 JEWELS N’ DRUGS – average 4.88

The highs: 10 x 2 [ @phantasmas @sillynate]

The lows: 1 x 21 [ @Batwings @Bronco @HIMe @Shipper @Space Cowboy @n1kos @Zed @Joshua81 @Ororo Munroe @GrandeAvenue @whoresup @monstertoronto @Jose Alberto @SpadesToStart @Zeitgeist @Scarlet Bitch @Tobcho @bionic @SpiritBunny @marrytheminogue @rinasawachanta]

The rate claims its first victim, & is anyone honestly surprised? Under-loved & overlooked, ‘Jewels N’ Drugs’ settled in last place immediately, & stayed there for the duration of the voting period. I wanted to spotlight @Juliandante's comment, which really engaged with the spirit of the song. Gaga has always been a chameleon, an experimenter, dabbling in pop or rock or jazz, bringing in influences from disco or country or EDM. Under the tutelage of DJ White Shadow, ‘Jewels N’ Drugs’ sees Gaga dive headfirst into trap, & she’s bringing three of the all-time greatest rappers along for the ride.

That makes the song a predictable first out, since Gaga isn’t actually on much of it. But to be fair, she does shine in her sections, her bridge lyrics “don’t want your jewels, I want your drugs, don’t want your money, want your love” reformulating the principles of ‘ARTPOP’ & ‘Mary Jane Holland’ for the rap soundscape in which she finds herself. The three rappers—T.I., Too $hort & Twista—deliver killer lines, with Gaga praising their “totally fearless” willingness to “make a record that was inclusive” & to collaborate with an artist known for her LGBTQ+ fanbase.

My hot (& correct) take is that there are several worse songs on the album. DJ White Shadow’s production on ‘Jewels N’ Drugs’ is immaculate: expansive without overwhelming, clean without feeling sanitised, the instrumental tightly constructed from start to finish. Twista’s verse, in particular, is thrilling in its runaway-train loquacity. The iTunes Festival performance, beginning with the hilarious exclamation “they wouldn’t let him into the country, poor thing!” about a US-bound T.I., is an absolute scream. This is just another of Gaga’s divisive experiments, like ‘Cake’ or ‘Stache’ or no doubt countless demos sat rotting on hard drives. But the difference is that, thanks to its glossy production & famous features, this one made it onto an album – & Gagadaily has collectively decided that it just doesn’t belong.

Comments:

  Reveal hidden contents

@TheSine A lot of people dislike the song, but it’s not bad when you’re in the right mood. If this was blasting in a club full of neon lights, I’d definitely start feeling it.

@HIMe Her worst song ever

@Werewolves Wanted I don’t care that this song is hated, it’s a really good one in my opinion. Love the killer family vibes she goes for lyrically.

@Onlygaga Monsters are waaay too harsh on this song. It’s definitely experimental for Gaga at the time, but it’s still catchy!

@Ultimecia DJWS went nuts on this one, and I love every dizzying second of it!

@Clarity I hate this song

@allanrocks I’m not a big fan of the song, but her vocals are amazing here.

@Julien Lockhart Clearly underrated

@ImMatt The main problem is the song doesn't have a proper chorus. The featured artists were poor choices and they don't add much. It's not a bad song though.

@JazzGa Not a fan of this one. The hook is so goofy it's throwaway, the rappers she "picked" (I mean DJWS picked for her) are totally random and TI is a problematic gross misogynist. She should have done her research for this one. 

@Gangie Interesting. Doesn’t deserve the hate it gets

@Joshua81 Huge mess. I only listened to this once maybe.

@TwistedTeeth A song that I personally think gets a lot of flack for no reason. Yes, it's a departure from Gaga's usual sound, but that's what the essence of ARTPOP is about. It's a fun song and DJ White Shadow breaks this song up in sections that keep it exciting. That said, I prefer the live version that was played during ArtRAVE. This song is definitely MEANT to be heard live.

@whoresup Disaster, enough said. 

@dimitristhe A bop, but quite mediocre compared to anything else Gaga released. Props to DJWS for the production, because he killed it here.

@ARTGOD This song slaps, the girls who get it get it. It’s not perfect but for an electronic trap song by Lady Gaga it’s as good as you can hope for. Production absolutely carries it though.

Oh, thank you for bringing my comment 🥰

[Auralegends 2,827]

Just now, Donatellah said:

just to be ignored

You take that back

[27monster27 9,602]

I forgot about the bonus songs lol.

[Ophelia 3,709]

Cake, a messy unreleased track > JnD an actual, mixed album track

yup yup thats correct