Sam Smith about people messing up their pronouns

[MonsterJay 1,539]

That post was very MAGA 

*Sprays it with Sanitizer* 

[VTV 12,769]

30 minutes ago, thisguyN said:

The way there is only one pronoun for all genders even animals, objects etc. in my language 

Same 

[PartySick 147,659]

Just a reminder that mistakes happen but intentionally misgendering someone or using the wrong pronouns on purpose etc etc will be warned

If you can't respect queer people then you really should reconsider whose fansite you're on

[ModernEcstasy 8,511]

Sometimes The way that people on this site and in public react to pronouns amazes me!

Can’t we all just be who we want to be? Why is it so difficult for people to accept something that literally has no impact on their own life. There always has to be an argument over it. 
 

Sam’s words are well said. We all make mistakes and as long as we are willing to change and move forward, then what’s the harm? 
Why do some people have to make a big deal of it. 

[HausOfAntonio 7,995]

I wonder how they would prefer people who don’t speak a language with gender neutral pronouns referring to them

[PartySick 147,659]

Just now, HausOfAntonio said:

I wonder how they would prefer people who don’t speak a language with gender neutral pronouns referring to them

I would assume if the pronouns are already gender neutral then just use the usual pronouns. The "they/them" thing only came about because English has gendered pronouns. If that problem doesn't exist in other languages then there's no need for a solution

[Anderson123 36,267]

It's nice that Sam makes it clear that it's ok to make mistakes but they keep educating people and it's important.

The one thing that is messy is when people like Demi are all like her pronouns are They/Them and 6 months later she's like "I'm She/Her now", and during that time people here just had no idea what to say and got banned/warning points in the process to later find out they change their pronouns again.  We're still learning I guess.

[hoeslay 4,145]

I, a nonbinary icon, agree.

[HausOfAntonio 7,995]

1 hour ago, PartySick said:

I would assume if the pronouns are already gender neutral then just use the usual pronouns. The "they/them" thing only came about because English has gendered pronouns. If that problem doesn't exist in other languages then there's no need for a solution

Well it kind of does because in Portuguese for example there is no way of referring to a noun without using a gendered pronoun… people love contorting the language and saying its possible but realistically it’s impossible to expect the entire population to learn a completely new vocabulary to refer to a relatively quite small group of people. 

[Rocketno10 2,056]

3 hours ago, SamanthaC said:

Just a reminder that not using someone’s preferred pronouns when clearly stated (especially on purpose) will result in a warning. 

 

4 hours ago, SlaeUrAnus said:

Girl, really 

I’m so stupid excuse me

[hoeslay 4,145]

1 hour ago, Anderson123 said:

The one thing that is messy is when people like Demi are all like her pronouns are They/Them and 6 months later she's like "I'm She/Her now", and during that time people here just had no idea what to say and got banned/warning points in the process to later find out they change their pronouns again.  We're still learning I guess.

Demi is very messy but this situation wasn't. She never got rid of they/them. She just said she's using she/her again as well. A lot of trans and nb folks feel comfortable using multiple sets of pronouns and sometimes one given set might be preferred. That's not messy.

[Guest]

I will use they when it's detailed in for example IG page. Otherwise in real life never used and in latin languages it doesn't really exist, or it sounds really awkward. I've never understood or grasped the idea of non-binary but i will still respect your They pronoun but imma be honest if i talk about someone and they r male or female to someone else ill use what im comfortable with which is he/she because I don't understand the concept of not feeling man or woman since i dont think anyone feels man or woman in a stereotypical gender conforming way. Of course if I love Football, Tupac, and Tony Montana doesn't mean i'm not woman enough, so therefore i have to be "nonbinary". Nah Im just a female who likes something, and things, colors, hobbies, clothes don't have gender. That's my view on it. And I actually think that we can all have our own views and perspective on gender and this is mine, but I bet i'll be insulted for having this opinion or told im a bigot but so be it, i'm ready for the replies and warning tbh

[Joshie 720]

21 minutes ago, AnnaNicoleSmith said:

I will use they when it's detailed in for example IG page. Otherwise in real life never used and in latin languages it doesn't really exist, or it sounds really awkward. I've never understood or grasped the idea of non-binary but i will still respect your They pronoun but imma be honest if i talk about someone and they r male or female to someone else ill use what im comfortable with which is he/she because I don't understand the concept of not feeling man or woman since i dont think anyone feels man or woman in a stereotypical gender conforming way. Of course if I love Football, Tupac, and Tony Montana doesn't mean i'm not woman enough, so therefore i have to be "nonbinary". Nah Im just a female who likes something, and things, colors, hobbies, clothes don't have gender. That's my view on it. And I actually think that we can all have our own views and perspective on gender and this is mine, but I bet i'll be insulted for having this opinion or told im a bigot but so be it, i'm ready for the replies and warning tbh

Well, a few things

1) It’s okay to not understand as long as you’re welcome to understanding.

2)  The reason people identify as non binary I guess is that regardless of what is between their legs, they feel neither male or female. Society tells people to wear a dress if you’re a female, that’s wrong and non binary people are there to crash the cis-tem essentially. Nothing in this world should be for an exclusive gender, and some people despite what society has told us do not feel male or female, nor do they succumb to societal views of what a male or female should or shouldn’t like/do/eat/feel/wear whatever.

SOMEONE educate me if I’m wrong here?!

3) I think it is okay, to assume male/female upon meeting someone or not knowing someone. I mean, If someone has a beard, a gf, kids, appear “masculine” I would use him/he. Unless they say oh wait im actually non binary, then you know going forward. If they don’t appear “masculine” or “feminine” I would probably ask for pronouns first. Or unless as you said, it’s on their IG, email signatures. At least that’s my view. Perhaps one day regardless of how someone appears it’ll be an ice breaker question. But it almost seems like you’re taking the piss out of non-binary people if your first question to a super “masculine” person is, so what’s your pronouns?

4) Objects/Hobbies etc do not have genders, they are not binary. It’s ****ing hilarious that society has built this into us. If you’re a woman and you like football it doesn’t mean you’re non binary. It just means you like ****ing football. Oh you had a baby girl? Let me buy you pink ****. **** me. 
 

5) I think saying you have an opinion on gender and therefore should be respected is a fine, since you said you respect pronouns and non-binary people, you just don’t understand it. But as long as you know it’s not necessarily for you to fully understand it, but respect it. Perhaps non-binary people don’t understand how someone can be binary? It’s all they’ve ever known I’m sure.

 

Omg in 12 year or something I’ve never written a reply more than 20 words. 

[Guest]

3 minutes ago, Joshie said:

2)  The reason people identify as non binary I guess is that regardless of what is between their legs, they feel neither male or female. Society tells people to wear a dress if you’re a female, that’s wrong and non binary people are there to crash the cis-tem essentially. Nothing in this world should be for an exclusive gender, and some people despite what society has told us do not feel male or female, nor do they succumb to societal views of what a male or female should or shouldn’t like/do/eat/feel/wear whatever.

 

4 minutes ago, Joshie said:

4) Objects/Hobbies etc do not have genders, they are not binary. It’s ****ing hilarious that society has built this into us. If you’re a woman and you like football it doesn’t mean you’re non binary. It just means you like ****ing football. Oh you had a baby girl? Let me buy you pink ****. **** me. 

Yes exactly this! I agree! Nothing has gender, things, hobbies, clothes, thoughts,  behavior, but then what makes you nonbinary? If you don't conform to gender stereotypes you just don't conform to it, but I thought it's what people who are nonbinary felt? That they don't really like women things as a female sex, and don't like men "things" as a female sex, or they like both and then they say oh im nonbinary. It's like Sam Smith said "i have woman thoughts sometimes" and likes makeup/dresses so he feels nonbinary, but what confuses me is that those are stereotypes of what a man is? So shouldn't you be able to be a man and love makeup, dresses, and not be nonbinary, but then what is nonbinary? Sorry taking this opportunity to ask but you don't have to answer if you don't feel like it. Whatever it is, I use the pronouns and respect it to not trigger people

[Joshie 720]

9 minutes ago, AnnaNicoleSmith said:

 

Yes exactly this! I agree! Nothing has gender, things, hobbies, clothes, thoughts,  behavior, but then what makes you nonbinary? If you don't conform to gender stereotypes you just don't conform to it, but I thought it's what people who are nonbinary felt? That they don't really like women things as a female sex, and don't like men "things" as a female sex, or they like both and then they say oh im nonbinary. It's like Sam Smith said "i have woman thoughts sometimes" and likes makeup/dresses so he feels nonbinary, but what confuses me is that those are stereotypes of what a man is? So shouldn't you be able to be a man and love makeup, dresses, and not be nonbinary, but then what is nonbinary? Sorry taking this opportunity to ask but you don't have to answer if you don't feel like it. Whatever it is, I use the pronouns and respect it to not trigger people

Because unfortunately society over time has given objects, hobbies, colours, clothing, hair cuts, you name it, genders. They’ve binaryized everything. And thus people that don’t identify with gender as a construct, nor societal norms, are breaking free. They do not fit the narrative of what we’ve been told is male/female.

And I guess it’s all a spectrum, some people just do not want to identify with male or female. And that’s their right. 

I'm still learning too and I am no expert. The best people to ask why they are “non binary” are they, themselves. That’s the best way to learn. I do understand where your coming from though because it’s almost like, if nothing had a binary to begin with, if two polar ends never existed - would non-binary exist?