the harry "queerbating" slander is RIDICULOUS

[AbhainnTirim 368]

I might sound a bit old fashioned, but what even is "queer-baiting" if we as a society have accepted that actions once determined "gay/queer" are mere social constructs abused to degrade minorities? (asking as a gay man myself)

Unless you falsely declare your identity as queer (if you can even do such a thing in 2022), I can't understand what else we could use to suggest that someone is falsely "acting" queer- which you can't do, unless you accept the old social constructs around homosexuality and queer identity as legitimate, the same constructs that meant we got bullied in playgrounds, the same constructs that have driven wedges between us and our families, the same constructs that have resulted in us getting funny looks on the street. 

100% willing to be enlightened. 

[HIM820 1,842]

3 minutes ago, Butters Stotch said:

A huge part of the gay community wants everyone to live unapologetically and be free, but as soon as a straight man is free and tries to be sexually provocative, they call it queerbating. Stop with this hypocrisy.

It stems from a form of jealousy. A lot of times they believe he’s able to do stuff or as some of them say “get away with it” when they themselves could not because of their own flamboyance. I’ve even seen people say he should come out so he can “suffer like the rest of us.” Its definitely hypocritical, but rooted in deep sadness and pain. Obviously this won’t change those feelings. 

[nATAH 50,141]

5 minutes ago, PartySick said:

Is androgyny owned by the gays though?

Michael Jackson, Prince, David Bowie, plenty of older rock stars, they all had "gender-bent" looks or embraced an androgynous style. It's about the freedom of expression. Men's style is usually so drab and limited, we should celebrate the men who step outside the norm and inject a little femininity into their image.

I fear what some people are accusing him of "appropriating" isn't something that's really owned by the gay community at all. Sequin tops, nail polish, sensitivity, we don't have a claim on these things 

And yes I chose you to quote 'cause I know if you respond I'll get a good answer

I can't believe I still haven't sat down and listened to his album  flop fan

you made some points but weren't Prince and Bowie clear with their sexuality? i'm too young to know anything about them

as i said before, it's the inauthenticity that bothers me but not enough that i think it should override his talent and artistry. it feels like they're saving the "coming out" to generate hype

i feel like it's a valid criticism but he's for sure way more interesting than 90% of male popstars of today

[Butters Stotch 5,364]

Just now, HIM820 said:

It stems from a form of jealousy. A lot of times they believe he’s able to do stuff or as some of them say “get away with it” when they themselves could not because of their own flamboyance. I’ve even seen people say he should come out so he can “suffer like the rest of us.” Its definitely hypocritical, but rooted in deep sadness and pain. Obviously this won’t change those feelings. 

I get your point, but they need to go to therapy to ease their pain and sadness. It's so sad that you had to go through a lot of sh*t and then expect others to experience the same as you just because. Where's their empathy?

I get so happy when I see someone that's not afraid to be who they are or when I see new generations enjoy themselves freely, it makes me happy to know that they CAN do what I couldn't and it's a huge relief knowing that as time goes by less people have to endure what I endured. Thinking the opposite is just selfish, immature and cruel, even if it's the result of the huge sadness you have within you.

[HIM820 1,842]

8 minutes ago, AbhainnTirim said:

I might sound a bit old fashioned, but what even is "queer-baiting" if we as a society have accepted that actions once determined "gay/queer" are mere social constructs abused to degrade minorities? (asking as a gay man myself)

The best example I can think of where I do get annoyed with it is in fictional narratives in movies or tv. When they have two characters (usually women) who are supposedly straight but the writers begin to just hint that they might like another character of the same sex. They never end up with each other though and it’s never explicitly said if they even had romantic feelings. That’s when it’s bad. 

[Chromatica Island 8,517]

So I guess straight men (not saying Harry is straight) can't dress feminine according to this thread or they're queerbaiting (JK not all of you) Also, why is it our business?

[Chlorine 47,976]

10 minutes ago, Butters Stotch said:

A huge part of the gay community wants everyone to live unapologetically and be free, but as soon as a straight man is free and tries to be sexually provocative, they call it queerbating. Stop with this hypocrisy.

3 minutes ago, HIM820 said:

It stems from a form of jealousy. A lot of times they believe he’s able to do stuff or as some of them say “get away with it” when they themselves could not because of their own flamboyance. I’ve even seen people say he should come out so he can “suffer like the rest of us.” Its definitely hypocritical, but rooted in deep sadness and pain. Obviously this won’t change those feelings. 

We don't know what his sexuality is, so to call him a "straight man" is quite homophobic. Why do you think he's straight, because he talks a certain way? Acts a certain way? It's an invasion of his privacy to assume his sexuality and it's homophobic to assign certain attributes to homosexuality. 

 

See how quickly y'alls arguments unravel? 

 

[Chlorine 47,976]

BTW I don't really care about his sexuality. And I think breaking gender norms is amazing and I applaud him for that. 

I do think if you're going to be an advocate for the community, I'd like to know if you're an ally or part of the community. Because it's different. It's really that simple. 

[qoqo 3,746]

3 minutes ago, Frank Potion said:

BTW I don't really care about his sexuality. And I think breaking gender norms is amazing and I applaud him for that. 

I do think if you're going to be an advocate for the community, I'd like to know if you're an ally or part of the community. Because it's different. It's really that simple. 

it’s not that mysterious as some of you make it. as long as he doesn’t come out as gay, he’s an ally, and that’s great. it’s really that simple.

[Butters Stotch 5,364]

2 minutes ago, Frank Potion said:

We don't know what his sexuality is, so to call him a "straight man" is quite homophobic. Why do you think he's straight, because he talks a certain way? Acts a certain way? It's an invasion of his privacy to assume his sexuality and it's homophobic to assign certain attributes to homosexuality. 

 

See how quickly y'alls arguments unravel? 

 

I'm speaking in general, not about someone in particular. Even though the thread is about Harry, if you go through it you can see other people named Charlie Puth too.

You just want to prove a point and it shows. I don't care about no one's sexuality and "my arguments" did not "unravel" because I stated them very clear in the post you quoted and the one I made before: men acting sexually provocative are not queerbating, they just enjoy feeling sexy and that's it. Some of you act as if only gay men can do that and that's unfair.

Let people be and stop questioning their actions as if we all didn't want the same, to be free to be who we are and enjoy our lives.

Get over it and leave me alone 

[Chlorine 47,976]

Let me also frame this in the context of race. 

I'm white and an ally to the black community. Those two states of being are very different. When you're an ally, you amplify the voices of the community you are supporting. It's not about you.

Because sexuality is invisible, Harry has the privilege of both being seen as a potential ally and/or a potential member of the community. So, how can he be a genuine ally, if he is one, without it being clear he is amplifying our voices and stories? That's my main thing.

[OMF 3,483]

I will agree with the original post here. Harry is at the very least Queer. Don’t need to have him admit it as it’s not something that everyone wants to label or identify with. The way he dresses, his general style and swagger, it’s queer. If he is gay, bi or whatever else is not something he owes to anyone to admit.

[Chlorine 47,976]

Just now, Butters Stotch said:

I'm speaking in general, not about someone in particular. Even though the thread is about Harry, if you go through it you can see other people named Charlie Puth too.

You just want to prove a point and it shows. I don't care about no one's sexuality and "my arguments" did not "unravel" because I stated them very clear in the post you quoted and the one I made before: men acting sexually provocative are not queerbating, they just enjoy feeling sexy and that's it. Some of you act as if only gay men can do that and that's unfair.

Let people be and stop questioning their actions as if we all didn't want the same, to be free to be who we are and enjoy our lives.

Get over it and leave me alone 

You are always defending Charlie Puth... it's kinda pathetic.

Get over it and put me on ignore if you can't handle it. 

[Butters Stotch 5,364]

1 minute ago, Frank Potion said:

You are always defending Charlie Puth... it's kinda pathetic.

That's non of your business, calling me pathetic only because of that is truly sad and it shows that you have a lot of anger within you, and I get how that feels, but it's not my fault. Go to therapy. You don't have to be so cruel to others. Like reading you makes it hard for me to believe I'm actually on a Gaga forum, some people haven't learned sh*t from this woman.

Bye 

[Hyoha 1,613]

David Bowie once said that his coming out as bisexual was a mistake.

Sometimes a person doesn’t need a label to work with an ideology.

Harry doesn’t need to come out as anything. He’s already challenging notions of what masculinity is, wearing dresses while dating Olivia fkin Wilde.

Even if he were 100% heterosexual, his attitude and his commitment to not giving a **** about gender rules are enough for me.