Demi understands pronouns are difficult to remember

[Hebi 13,928]

If they don't mind when people misgender them... then GGD should calm down

[alsemanche 93,954]

9 minutes ago, Hebi said:

If they doesn't mind when people misgender them... then GGD should calm down

They don't mind when people ACCIDENTALLY misgender them. Not when edgy GGD users do it on purpose then make fun on people who correct them. 

[HEARTSTOP 3,147]

I respect them being non-binary, and this might be one of the few remotely sensical things they have ever written. 

However, it's very weird to me that they can misgender themself after all this time. It would make sense that the pronouns that they feel more comfortable with are the ones that come naturally to them, right? Why do they feel the need to rewire themself to use these pronouns? Is it because other people said these are the pronouns that non-binary people should use?

I am confused, please educate me because I really don't get why you would need to try to re-program yourself to use pronouns that don't come naturally to you when referring to yourself...

[js4754394o9823 6,882]

1 minute ago, HEARTSTOP said:

I respect them being non-binary, and this might be one of the few remotely sensical things they have ever written. 

However, it's very weird to me that they can misgender themself after all this time. It would make sense that the pronouns that they feel more comfortable with are the ones that come naturally to them, right? Why do they feel the need to rewire themself to use these pronouns? Is it because other people said these are the pronouns that non-binary people should use?

I am confused, please educate me because I really don't get why you would need to try to re-program yourself to use pronouns that don't come naturally to you when referring to yourself...

You're not analyzing every word that you're using in a sentence, some of it comes automatically

If Demi used she their whole life, they got used to it even if it felt uncomfortable or wrong

You can't change something like that in one day, you're brain needs some time to learn it too

[Meruk Holland 2,284]

14 hours ago, KanyeWest said:

Well ive yet to see scientific papers talking about gender dysphoria in nonbinaries. Transpeople have it so anything outside their sex can trigger them as they feel more the opposite gender. But with nonbinary they say they feel nothing, very neutral, or both female and male, if they have gender dysphoria then they are trans who don't abide by gender stereotypes which by the way many don't (i don't). It's your freedom to see and categorize yourself as you please, but I dont understand the concept of a gender neutral pronoun if the other pronouns don't trigger you, just because it's a hassle in everyday life to remember each and everyone's pronoun and you often forget and misgender because it's not natural and your brain can't adjust. Also there are now many other pronouns you have to memorize, it's unrealistic. Also it's my opinion only but I think everyone is nonbinary because everyone is not a stereotype of a gender, it's impossible to be. There are women who dress like men everyday and do "men" activities, but activities, clothes, attitude, personnality cannot be gendered!!! Therefore if nothing is gendered because it makes no sense, then not abiding to them is just not abiding to societal ideas of genders, which many don't, so you're not special if you're nonbinary, many aren't. If you have dysphoria you are trans. Just how I see it.

https://www.researchgate.net/profile/M-Galupo/publication/342721998_There_Is_Nothing_to_Do_About_It_Nonbinary_Individuals'_Experience_of_Gender_Dysphoria/links/5f03bf0b458515505091970d/There-Is-Nothing-to-Do-About-It-Nonbinary-Individuals-Experience-of-Gender-Dysphoria.pdf

TL:DR - Nonbinary people not only experience dysphoria, but its entirely unique form of dysphoria. Further, dysphoria is a bad metric to define what it is to be trans. This was just the first one I grabbed when googling "Non binary gender dysphoria," there are plenty more.

[alsemanche 93,954]

11 hours ago, HEARTSTOP said:

I respect them being non-binary, and this might be one of the few remotely sensical things they have ever written. 

However, it's very weird to me that they can misgender themself after all this time. It would make sense that the pronouns that they feel more comfortable with are the ones that come naturally to them, right? Why do they feel the need to rewire themself to use these pronouns? Is it because other people said these are the pronouns that non-binary people should use?

I am confused, please educate me because I really don't get why you would need to try to re-program yourself to use pronouns that don't come naturally to you when referring to yourself...

It's not about how they perceive themselves but rather how they are used to speaking. When you're used to using certain words for years and then adapt to a new way of speaking, obviously you will make mistakes sometimes (which is also what Demi is saying they understand when people do). It's not about what people have dictated they should use, but rather their brain adapting to their new identity. I have nb friends who still go through the same thing despite being nb for a while. They accidentally refer to themselves as she instead of they because they have done that for the bigger part of their life and adapting to new pronouns takes a while. It doesn't say anything about their identity though, it's just language and speech.

[Jester 6,334]

How can you "forget" how you feel and what's your truth  

Ridiculous

[REALITY 77,150]

And of course, every thread that relates to Demi, their pronouns, and pronouns in general turns into a cesspool people not taking this sh*t seriously. I mean, at this point I'm not surprised, but it's really rather sad. Just address them by the pronouns they prefer. That's it.

As Demi put it, sometimes it's difficult to remember people's pronouns, and if you accidentally misgender someone, that's fine, as long as you remember to use the correct pronouns next time. It'll take time to adjust to, but at the end of the day, you gotta make an effort to try. 

[Pennywise 36,079]

Honestly this whole argument here infuriates me so much. Like, how ****ing hard it could be to NOT be a little **** and use the correct pronouns? Furthermore, WHY would you go out of your way to misgender someone? 

 

Don't even start with arguments about other languages. My native language has no gender, too, and YET, I always try to use the correct gender in English. It's called decency, a concept some of you may have not ever heard of. 

 

The way one perceives their native language is vastly different from any other language, too. For example, a word that would not hurt me in English could hurt me in my native language simply because it had more emotional weight on how I perceive things.

 

As an example of this, the word f** means absolutely nothing to me, so when I'm having a conversation in English, while it might be annoying, it does not hurt me. However, I can't stand it when people use the equivalent of it in my native language.

 

This could work in reverse too: while I (or you) might not care about gendered language simply because we don't have it in our native languages, English speakers might have a more emotional response to it and that is perfectly understandable. 

 

TL:DR - Don't be ****ing rude. 

[alsemanche 93,954]

2 minutes ago, Pennywise said:

Don't even start with arguments about other languages. My native language has no gender, too, and YET, I always try to use the correct gender in English. It's called decency, a concept some of you may have not ever heard of. 

Literally both my first language (Arabic) and the language I used in my 14 years of school and high school (French) are gendered af and don't have gender neutral terms like "they" and YET here I am using gender neutral language and terms like it's literally not that hard if you put an ounce of effort into it. 

[Dr Fudge 8,635]

I like this a lot. Have you ever had a time where you thought you knew someone’s name and later they corrected you, but then you catch yourself almost mistakenly calling them the name you initially called them? Same diff. Trying with good intent is key.

[Pennywise 36,079]

1 minute ago, alsemanche said:

Literally both my first language (Arabic) and the language I used in my 14 years of school and high school (French) are gendered af and don't have gender neutral terms like "they" and YET here I am using gender neutral language and terms like it's literally not that hard if you put an ounce of effort into it. 

Like, I hate the people who try to play the devil's advocate about human rights and issues of decency. I deeply hate them 

[Economy 50,013]

Just a side note on this the pronoun "they" can be confusing as hell. Depending how a sentence starts, if you dont already know its talking about a person at first u think its talking about multiple people in plural form. 

 

I think the ze and zir is easier but its less used