Create Gaga’s Opening Monologue if she did SNL

[eddyjeddy 1,266]

If Gaga was to host and appear on SNL, what would you think her monologue would be? What topics in her current life would she integrate into her monologue; will she shade anyone? Will she shade herself? Let’s be creative and discuss sistrenz

[Jackaroo 575]

In no particular order, her talking points:

-Disco stick

- her flying dress

- Perez Hilton

- Her penis

- Madonna 

- ARTPOP 

- Joanne World Tour 

- Covid-19

- JK Rowling 

- Joker 2 

- Fermented Arnica 

- Enigma Wig 

Edited 4 hours ago by Jackaroo

[eddyjeddy 1,266]

“Thank you! Thank you so much! Wow, hosting Saturday Night Live—what an honor. I mean, this stage has been home to so many legends: Eddie Murphy, Gilda Radner, and maybe Elon Musk? Look, there can be 100 people in the room and all you need is 1 to believe in you and that won’t be Elon Musk.

But let’s get into it. Yes, I’m here, fresh off my role as Harley Quinn in Joker: Folie à Deux. And, uh… let’s talk abou the elephant in the room. I poured my heart and soul into that movie. I danced, I sang, I cried, I even kissed Joaquin Phoenix—which, let me tell you, feels like something they should give out vaccines for afterward. And what did we get? A box office DISEASE.

 

[Catnikko 13,656]

I have been hosting since i was 13 

[robboadam 1,935]

She already did tho?

[Bonkers 27,951]

"I hope you enjoyed Lady Starlight!!!!  That's all our time for tonight!!  Goodnight everyone!  I love you!!! xoxox"

[eddyjeddy 1,266]

Gaga:

Now, I know what you’re all thinking. ‘Gaga, you’re so busy! You just finished Joker 2, you’re saving pop music, AND you just dropped a new single called Disease!’ And to that, I say… yes, I did.

 

But here’s the thing—I’m not doing any promo for it. None. Zip. Nada. Not a single TikTok, no awkward interviews where I pretend to know what a Spotify Wrapped is. I didn’t even tweet about it. Why? Because I’m Lady Gaga. I don’t need to promote my music; my fans will find it. My little monsters are like bloodhounds for a bop.

 

You know, the label called me and said, ‘Gaga, are you really just going to drop this song and do nothing?’ And I said, ‘Exactly. This is my era of mystery. Also, I’m tired.’

 

I mean, let’s be real: promoting a song called Disease is already risky. People hear the name and go, ‘Oh no, is this about Joker 2?’ And honestly, maybe it is. I spent six months method acting as Harley Quinn, and the only thing I got was a bad box office and an emotional rash.

[Quentin 5,203]

10 minutes ago, eddyjeddy said:

Gaga:

Now, I know what you’re all thinking. ‘Gaga, you’re so busy! You just finished Joker 2, you’re saving pop music, AND you just dropped a new single called Disease!’ And to that, I say… yes, I did.

 

But here’s the thing—I’m not doing any promo for it. None. Zip. Nada. Not a single TikTok, no awkward interviews where I pretend to know what a Spotify Wrapped is. I didn’t even tweet about it. Why? Because I’m Lady Gaga. I don’t need to promote my music; my fans will find it. My little monsters are like bloodhounds for a bop.

 

You know, the label called me and said, ‘Gaga, are you really just going to drop this song and do nothing?’ And I said, ‘Exactly. This is my era of mystery. Also, I’m tired.’

 

I mean, let’s be real: promoting a song called Disease is already risky. People hear the name and go, ‘Oh no, is this about Joker 2?’ And honestly, maybe it is. I spent six months method acting as Harley Quinn, and the only thing I got was a bad box office and an emotional rash.

"You know what, I won't even promote the single here on SNL, I'm leaving! Xo, xo, love and art"

Edited 1 hour ago by Quentin

[RAMROD 103,958]

She will sing somehow.

The last time she hosted she did sing