"Help came too late for me" SAG speech

[Katie14 4,828]

 

I finally got around to watching her speech at the SAG AFTER event and I absolutely love that she is talking so openly and honestly about mental health. I respect her so much for using her platform for good and helping people. However she talked about how her mental health got so bad because she didn't have access to resources to help her. If I was someone who lives in pain, physically or mentally and was too poor to get any type of treatment I would be annoyed with Gaga for talking about how she didn't have access. Gaga always had access to mental health services, she just chose to not seek help until her problems got so bad that she had to get help in order to function. Its possible I'm misunderstanding her but it seems to me that she wanted somebody to swoop in and save her. She wanted someone to notice she was feeling off and push her into therapy. I just feel like we are all responsible for our own happiness. If she felt anxiety and depression it was her job to seek out help for herself.  

I agree that it would be great if all of us paid more attention to each other and talked more about our feelings but Idk it just kind of bothers me the way she said help came too late for her and how she's blaiming the system we live in for that when she could have sought out help whenever she wanted. And then there are many people out there who actually cannot get help because their country doesn't offer services or they are too poor to afford them.

 

[derpmonster 22,412]

13 minutes ago, Katie14 said:

I just feel like we are all responsible for our own happiness. 

This isn't a good approach. Many people don't seek treatment because of their mental health problems because depression can make you feel like you're unworthy and undeserving.

Additionally, this is just her phrasing that I wouldn't read too much into. It's just passive voice which could just be an alternative way of saying "I didn't get help soon enough" without implying that someone else should've stepped in. Gaga has a quirky command of language.

[Katie14 4,828]

1 minute ago, derpmonster said:

This isn't a good approach. Many people don't seek treatment because of their mental health problems because depression can make you feel like you're unworthy and undeserving.

Additionally, this is just her phrasing that I wouldn't read too much into. It's just passive voice which could just be an alternative way of saying "I didn't get help soon enough" without implying that someone else should've stepped in. Gaga has a quirky command of language.

I just feel like she has a this desire to get other people to be on board with her before seeking help and that is what is an unhealthy approach. I think the same thing happened with her hip. She said that her team didn't take her concerns seriously, which sucks and is really unfair but if she felt like something was wrong I feel like she should have just stuck to her intuition and made a doctor's appointment. If something is wrong with me, I don't rely on other people to agree with me before taking action to help myself. 

[joannesrats 26]

The issue with depression and anxiety isn't necessarily the access to mental healthcare, it's how it is seen. People in therapy or something along the lines are seen as crazy and out of line. However, the way she phrased it could have been better. Gaga also may have just been at a point where the depression was telling her that it wasn't going to work and that she would always feel this way. As someone who suffers from sometimes debilitating depression and anxiety (I'm in therapy and on meds and it's still bad some days), just getting yourself to therapy can be one of the hardest things to do. Happiness isn't a choice, it's a condition and state of being - and you can't always choose that. 

[giskardsb 12,565]

It’s also posible shes just implying that a lack of awareness and discussion on these subjects prevented her from recognizing the problem earlier. 

[Katie14 4,828]

1 minute ago, PhillipBagshaw said:

The issue with depression and anxiety isn't necessarily the access to mental healthcare, it's how it is seen. People in therapy or something along the lines are seen as crazy and out of line. However, the way she phrased it could have been better. Gaga also may have just been at a point where the depression was telling her that it wasn't going to work and that she would always feel this way. As someone who suffers from sometimes debilitating depression and anxiety (I'm in therapy and on meds and it's still bad some days), just getting yourself to therapy can be one of the hardest things to do. Happiness isn't a choice, it's a condition and state of being - and you can't always choose that. 

All that makes sense to me but yea I think she needed to explain herself better. I wish she literally said what you just wrote because people watching this are going to think the same way I thought about this. I mean she said, "if I had access to mental health services it wouldn't have gotten as bad as it did" People who listen to that are going to be like, "what do you mean of course you had access, why didn't you just make a therapy appointment?" But yea she probably didn't feel like she deserved help or felt ashamed to get help and needed someone on her team that was designated as a mental health specialist to be able to notice problems and treat her and break down the mental and emotional barriers to access that she had. 

[Seeka 12,372]

Technically, Gaga probably had problems even before she was famous. Idk for sure, but having problems for so long would have an effect.

The thing is is that it's different from person to person. 

Plus should we really be judging someone who just massively helped the community of people with mental illnesses and syndromes by picking at the way she speaks?

Have you ever thought picking at what someone says/does discourages them from doing things?

It's not like there is some underlying malinent. Gaga just doesn't speak well sometimes.

[Sanne Godijn 2,203]

2 minutes ago, Seeka said:

Technically, Gaga probably had problems even before she was famous. Idk for sure, but having problems for so long would have an effect.

The thing is is that it's different from person to person. 

Plus should we really be judging someone who just massively helped the community of people with mental illnesses and syndromes by picking at the way she speaks?

Have you ever thought picking at what someone says/does discourages them from doing things?

It's not like there is some underlying malinent. Gaga just doesn't speak well sometimes.

Our girl needs to take some speech lessons im sure they understood what she tried to say

[Katie14 4,828]

8 minutes ago, Seeka said:

Technically, Gaga probably had problems even before she was famous. Idk for sure, but having problems for so long would have an effect.

The thing is is that it's different from person to person. 

Plus should we really be judging someone who just massively helped the community of people with mental illnesses and syndromes by picking at the way she speaks?

Have you ever thought picking at what someone says/does discourages them from doing things?

It's not like there is some underlying malinent. Gaga just doesn't speak well sometimes.

I literally opened by saying im happy she is speaking about this topic and I respect her for it. I don't think im being nitpicky. She said she didn't have access to mental health care. Gaga is a very wealthy woman who lives in a country that has mental health services. People who actually do not have access because of where they live or their financial situation would be annoyed and offended by what she said. Other people have pointed out to me that Gaga meant to say that she essentially had mental barriers to receiving treatment. I feel like she should have been more clear with her words so she doesn't upset people. 

[Glamourpuss 29,062]

Honestly when you are so low you don't have the strength to help yourself. You actually do feel like you're stuck in a hole and you can't get out. It can make you feel worthless and insignificant and if you've got a running commentary in your head telling you horrible things about yourself, it becomes your world and your new normal and you get used to it. When you get like this you do need outside help. You need love and support from people because you lack the strength to pull yourself out of the hole. You need that human interaction - somebody outside of your mind telling you that you are loved and saying positive things to kill the negative ones that have consumed you. 

[Seeka 12,372]

17 minutes ago, Sanne Godijn said:

Our girl needs to take some speech lessons im sure they understood what she tried to say

She speaks just fine.

Speech therapy did nothing but make me cry and want to kill the old redheaded bitch that was my teacher. Oh, and give me anxiety about my voice and how I spoke for years.

11 minutes ago, Katie14 said:

I literally opened by saying im happy she is speaking about this topic and I respect her for it. I don't think im being nitpicky. She said she didn't have access to mental health care. Gaga is a very wealthy woman who lives in a country that has mental health services. People who actually do not have access because of where they live or their financial situation would be annoyed and offended by what she said. Other people have pointed out to me that Gaga meant to say that she essentially had mental barriers to receiving treatment. I feel like she should have been more clear with her words so she doesn't upset people. 

If you know what she was getting at then other people probably did to. Not to mention, most people I know who are seriously impaired by their illness usually know that people don't say exactly what they mean to 

 

You're making a big deal out of nothing. 

[Sanne Godijn 2,203]

5 minutes ago, Seeka said:

She speaks just fine.

Speech therapy did nothing but make me cry and want to kill the old redheaded bitch that was my teacher. Oh, and give me anxiety about my voice and how I spoke for years.

If you know what she was getting at then other people probably did to. Not to mention, most people I know who are seriously impaired by their illness usually know that people don't say exactly what they mean to 

 

You're making a big deal out of nothing. 

Im sorry i didnt mean to upset you it was just a stupid joke mine 

[Katie14 4,828]

2 minutes ago, Seeka said:

She speaks just fine.

Speech therapy did nothing but make me cry and want to kill the old redheaded bitch that was my teacher. Oh, and give me anxiety about my voice and how I spoke for years.

If you know what she was getting at then other people probably did to. Not to mention, most people I know who are seriously impaired by their illness usually know that people don't say exactly what they mean to 

 

You're making a big deal out of nothing. 

Im trying to have a discussion about this and I don't think its fair for you to say im being nitpicky and making a big deal. You are basically saying that my thoughts about her speech are inappropriate or silly. The whole point of the Gaga Thoughts section is too discuss our feelings about Gaga and I shouldn't have to defend myself for bringing up my opinions for how Gaga worded her speech.

[LateToCult 36,297]

She probably didn’t word it exactly how she meant it. 

[Seeka 12,372]

28 minutes ago, Katie14 said:

Im trying to have a discussion about this and I don't think its fair for you to say im being nitpicky and making a big deal. You are basically saying that my thoughts about her speech are inappropriate or silly. The whole point of the Gaga Thoughts section is too discuss our feelings about Gaga and I shouldn't have to defend myself for bringing up my opinions for how Gaga worded her speech.

You also said yourself that you're not in pain, mentally or physically? You haven't had a time when everyday you wanted to kill yourself?

Have you had days when you switched between five different personalities in one day? And you have to ask your best friend what those personalities did so that they didn't do anything stupid?

Listen, I have depression. My bestie has BPD and DID and depression. It's mostly financial for us, yeah. But as others have said, there are things in and outside one's mind that prevents them from going to therapy. Plus it takes a few good visits to know whether or not that therapist is for you.

I didn't mean to be mean, but you are, to me, basically trying to deflate a well meaning speech.

Okay, she should have said something differently. Did you have another point to make?